I know both men and women do this in a relationship but?

Its natural human nature to be curious and suspicious and due to this we are constantly playing these mind games with each other. We say one thing when we mean another and wait to see how our partner acts upon it to try and get a "true" reaction on how they feel. Sometimes these tests come from lack of trust or curiosity and its just your partners way of trying to figure you out. The underlying problem here is LACK OF COMMUNICATION. There is an obstacle that is in the way between you two and it's preventing both of you from effectively and openly explaining how you feel. A good relationship is based on great communication and if you and your partner can't talk about certain subjects with each other and instead resort to these tests then you will be in line for a future full of frustration and distrust. What you need to do is learn how to communicate with your partner and ask each other direct questions that reflect your true concerns. No more beating around the bush. Explain to your partner that this is an ongoing problem and that you would like to communicate better with them.